Posted in love

Links of Love 

I used to take care of myself. I made certain I looked my best most days. I exercised. I watched what I ate. Unlike many women who lose their appetite post divorce, I couldn’t seem to eat enough. I stopped exercising and had a steady diet of junk food. I always took care of myself to please my ex-husband. I worried he’d leave me if I didn’t live up to his expectations. Imagine my surprise when I discovered it didn’t matter. I was looking better than I had in ten years and he left. And with it, my desire for self care walked out too.

Now 4.5 years later, I’m ready to take care of myself but finding the strength to take the first few steps seems overwhelming. 30 pounds needs to go for health reasons. I know exercise is an antidepressant and will help keep the demons away. I also know how I feel about myself is directly related to how connected each link in my circle is. Each thing needs to be connected to the other. 

Link One: Me time-it’s okay to make an effort to look attractive. It says I love myself.

Link Two: Exercise makes me feel strong and when I feel strong, my confidence grows.

Link Three: When I feel healthy, I look better and feel better. 

Link Four: Creative time- whether I’m writing or sewing or reading, I find it nourishes my soul. And when my soul is being fed, I feel happier.

Link Five: Don’t isolate myself. It’s been easy to do but being with people is key to me feeling better.

Now all I have to do is find the willpower to take those first few steps to begin rebuilding my links of strength.

Posted in life, love, Uncategorized

Imperfections 


When you buy a diamond, the jeweler examines it for flaws. The fewer flaws it has, the higher the price. It has a greater value. I think our society has fallen into this trap except we apply the microscope to people. If they have the smallest flaw, they are dismissed. We all know the power of photoshop. I fall into this trap and don’t want to post any photo of myself unless I remove the eye wrinkles and whiten my teeth. Heaven forbid if I had some real rather than perceived flaw. If we are are privileged enough to live to old age, we will have wrinkles, scars, skin folds etc. Only those who die young, die without evidence of living. 

I love the Winston Graham novels about Ross Poldark. And in book four The Black Moon, his wife is embarrassed about her scarred knees. In the modern world the husband would be giving her the name of a good plastic surgeon so she could ‘fix’ the scars. But Ross says one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever read, “Blemishes on the beauty of a person one loves are like grace notes adding something to a piece of music.” 

I can add nothing more profound or loving to that statement.

Posted in Uncategorized

If we would only …..

Why do we talk to ourselves like this?
Take a moment to watch the video. It has English subtitles but a universal message.