Tag: gifts

Posted in book review, characters, Uncategorized

Are we born with it?

Posted on by Dede

    I love the Poldark Series by Winston Graham. My favorite character is Demelza and this is why I am so captivated by her.

 A quote from Demelza by Winston Graham. “He sighed and put her hand against his cheek. It was not a disconsolate sigh, for her returning life was a tonic to his soul. Whatever she suffered, whatever loss came to her, she would throw it off, for it was not in her nature to go under…..But chiefly it was because some element had put in her nature to be happy. She was born so and could not change.”Are we born with a certain personality? We all know people who always seem to be happy regardless of their circumstances and there are people who are always depressed and sad. Do we come into this world one way or the other with no hopes of changing? Clearly Ross believes Demelza was born with a happy disposition and could not change. He believes he has her opposite disposition with a perpetually pessimistic outlook.
I’ve read so many books about this very topic. You can find a book to support both positions but now many experts agree that our outlook on life is a combination of our inborn personality and life experiences. I can attest to this. My sister and I are two years apart but on the opposite ends of optimism and pessimism. Wish I could say I was the lucky one with the natural sunny outlook but I’m not. I have to work everyday to have a positive outlook and believe the best is ahead of me.

Reading Ross and Demelza’s story resonates with me. It reminds me they we do have a choice on how we perceive our life and a choice to how we react and proceed forward when things don’t go our way. This is why I titled my blog Living Like Demelza. I want to work towards living with Demelza’s spirit and attitude in my own life.

Posted in Uncategorized, wedding

Where have basic manners gone?

Posted on by Dede

  
I went to a wedding mid-November. It is now two months later and I haven’t received a Thank you note from the bride and groom. You may think it’s only two months but I sent a baby gift to another young woman mid- December who not only has a new baby and a toddler, she had a houseful of company for Christmas. I received a thoughtful thank note last week.

If brides and grooms do NOT plan on sending thank you notes then PLEASE print on the invitations the following:

We are selfish and greedy. You are only being invited for your gift but we will not be sending thank you notes. Our time is more valuable than the the time you spent shopping for a gift and our money is more important than whatever you spent on us.

I would have a much clearer idea of which weddings to attend. I understand lots of things have changed. Brides and grooms live together many time for years before they marry and if they aren’t living together, they are certainly sleeping together. Sometimes they even have children together. But what hasn’t seemed to change is the big, splashy wedding and party following the ceremony. Well if they want that then along with it comes the simple act of showing appreciation to those that came to celebrate with you by sending a thank you note. If you are uncertain what to say here you go:

Dear xxx,

Thank you for sharing (or remembering- if they couldn’t come) our special day with us. The xyz will make 1. A special addition to our first home. 2. Look beautiful in our first home 3. Will be used all the time in the kitchen etc. 4. The money will be put towards xyz. We appreciate you taking the time to give us such a special gift.

That’s it. It’s not difficult. So brides write them to your family and guests. Grooms write them to your family and guests. Get off your duffs!