Tag: lessons

Posted in life

Getting home from Rio

Posted on by Dede

What’s the worst travel experience you’ve ever had?

When I was 21 years old, I was on the game show Hollywood squares. One of the prizes I won was an all expense paid trip for two to Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. I invited my dear friend Michele to join me and we opted to go in late August which would have been the end of winter for them, but it has a temperate climate so the weather was good.

It was a seven day six night trip. We were young and when I was determining the dates I counted incorrectly and when it was time to return home, we got to the airport one full day late. We panicked because we had to be back to university in a couple days.

This was back in 1981 and very few people spoke English in Brazil and neither of us spoke Portuguese. No one at the airport could help us, because my tickets had no cash value since I had won them as a prize. Neither one of us could afford to buy new tickets, and our parents were not in financial positions to buy us new tickets. We decided to take a taxi to an airline office. It’s been so long ago that I can’t even remember the name of the airline.

Fortunately the agent spoke some English and we explained our situation. Being very emotional I started crying because I really didn’t know how we were gonna get home. The agent was so kind. She ended up giving us two complimentary tickets on her airline and I will say this airline was much better and nicer than the airline. We originally flew down on which was based in Columbia.

Again, this is before the advent of any type of personal cell phones and we had no idea how we were going to contact our parents about the change of arrival in Los Angeles. Another cab ride to the American embassy and we managed to slip in the door as someone was leaving.

By the grace of God, we were able to speak with someone in the U.S. Navy who allowed us to call home. We made one call to Michele’s parents with the new arrival information.

Back to the airport for a very long day waiting for our departure. We finally departed. We changed planes in Peru and finally reached Los Angeles.

Looking back I realized my mistake. We left the west coast of the U.S. and flew to the east coast of Brazil. There was a stop over with a change of planes in Bogota, Columbia. It never occurred to me our first day of the trip was the day we left and not the day we arrived. Hence, I began counting on the wrong day.

It was a stressful lesson but it’s also a a mistake I’ve never made again.

Posted in life

Lyon

Posted on by Dede

What’s a moment in your life that made you feel truly alive?

1999, October. I went for a week to a language school in Lyon. I was alone. My marriage was struggling. A change was desperately needed.

The colors of autumn were vibrant. The classes were held in an old large, manor home. There weren’t many of us and most students were either beginner or intermediate level. I was told US French teachers come in the summer.

In addition to classes, we had a couple tours, a cooking class and a wine tasting class.

When I took my first walk, breathed in the cool air, being immersed in the autumnal colors and surrounded by history, I felt fully alive.

Posted in life

Major control

Posted on by Dede

How do you deal with uncertainty?

For most of my life I was a control freak. The more I controlled, the more anxiety I had but was convinced if I had control the anxiety would be relieved.

Ask my daughters and they will confirm I did my best to control everyone and everything around me. It’s genetic. My grandmother controlled my mother. My mother did her best to control me but wasn’t always successful.

I didn’t control my girls as much, but I definitely exercised control when I could.

Then one day I realized that control was a mirage. I never had had control. When my world came crashing down, it was a tough lesson.

Now I understand control is a mirage. The only constant is the Lord. And He is always full of surprises.

So mostly now I don’t even think about uncertainty. As long as I live, what happens in life will be uncertain. And I can trust it’ll all work out.

Posted in communication, Experience, family, Fun, Goal, Uncategorized, words, Writing

3rd Time the Charm?

Posted on by Dede

camera

I signed up for informal education at UT. The beginning DSLR photography class began last Monday. The class isn’t too large but except for me and one man, no one in the class is over 30. I definitely felt singled out due to age. The instructor kept asking me if I was of understanding the technology. I realize I do remember things that most of the class have never even used. (cassette tapes, instamatic cameras, VHS tapes, phone book etc.) When the instructor mentioned ISO just the two of us had any idea what it was and how it was used. I always had ISO 100, 200 and 400 film on hand. I have a large box of negatives and boxes of photos.

I commented that with digital photography, I rarely have photos printed and because of that, I never really look at any of the memories I captured. My daughter did find a great app called Artifact Uprising. It is an easy to use app that allows you to upload photos of your choice and make great photo books. I’ve used one of the better known sites but I like the look and feel of the Artifact Uprising book better. I ordered a 5.5 x 5.5 soft cover photo book. I had photos from my three months in Tours, France but I wasn’t enjoying them because they were on my computer. I did it all from my Iphone too. You can go to their website Artifact Uprising Now I can enjoy my photos.

Since I titled this 3rd times the charm, it is because this is the 3rd time I’ve taken beginning DSLR photography. I hope this time it sinks in and I take the time to record memories and moments through pictures. Because when I am long gone, they will remain as a doorway into my life for future generations.

toursbook

Posted in Blogging, choices, Experience, fear, Goal, New life, Uncategorized, values, Writing

Lesson to Unlearn #2

Posted on by Dede

 Why would want to try that? You’ll only fail.

  

Yes that is the lesson I was taught. I’m sure my parents and grandmother thought they were protecting me from  disappointment. If I struggled and failed then what would they say? Would they be able to comfort me?

I remember wanting to enter a pageant for a second time and asking for a new formal dress. I was promptly told no and when I asked why? It was simple. I wasn’t going to win anyway. However there was a hiccup in my parents’ plan. I did win. I won in the same dress I wore the year before. Obviously I didn’t need a new dress to win, but to have had words of encouragement, a sense that my parents believed in my ability to succeed and if I didn’t win, the success was in the effort and what I learned would have helped build my confidence.

There are lots of things I haven’t tried in my life for fear of failure. But I have been able to push through the fear from time to time and challenge myself with new things. I spent a year learning on my own how to dance so I could make the drill team squad. I worked for a year saving money to spend six weeks on a college tour of Europe. I auditioned for and went on a game show. {I won}. I went to France in my own at 40 for 10 days. But I still have a list of things I would love to try but fear of failure keeps be down.

So lesson #2 to unlearn is that when you try something you’ll only fail.

Success isn’t defined by winning. It’s defined by trying. There is no shame in trying some new or something difficult. It says courage, adventure and strength. These quotes are profound because they are so true.

Never confuse a single defeat with a final defeat.

F. Scott Fitzgerald

It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed.

Theodore Roosevelt

I can’t give you a sure-fire formula for success, but I can give you a formula for failure: try to please everybody all the time. Herbert Bayard Swope

Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.

Winston S. Churchill

When you take risks you learn that there will be times when you succeed and there will be times when you fail, and both are equally important.

Ellen DeGeneres, Seriously… I’m Kidding

Posted in Blogging, Blogging101, choices, Dreaming, Experience, fashion, Fun, Goal, help, love, New life, questions, Sew, writing101

See many bad habits

Posted on by Dede

  Today I had my first class from http://www.stitch labs.biz in Austin. I’ve seen for years but have acquired many bad habits. Bad habits in sewing and life. Working on changing bad sewing habits and bad life habits.

Posted in Blogging, Blogging101, choices, costumes, daughters, depression, divorce, Dreaming, Experience, Faith, family, fashion, fear, friends, friendship, Fun, Goal, God, help, Hiding, love, New life, Uncategorized, women, Writing, writing lessons, writing101

And Sew it Begins

Posted on by Dede

 

As I have said in my earlier posts, I’ve become a recluse. I have begun to worry if I am developing agoraphobia (the fear of public places). It’s so easy to stay in my apartment and the more I do it, the easier it becomes. I have made the first step towards to shutting the door or should I say opening the door to prevent that from happening.

I have signed up for three weeks of sewing classes at Stitch Labs in Austin. I have been sewing for more than 40 years, but didn’t want to take a class that would be so frustrating I would end up feeling like a failure. So I selected a beginner II class. We will make a pillow with piping and a zipper the first week. The following two weeks we will make a book style bag. I hope to brush up my skills and then possibly take a more advance class.

One of my most cherished memories are the dresses I made for my daughters and all the Halloweens I made costumes for them and then later on for my neighbors’ children. The photos bring back such happy memories. With this class, I hope to take the first step towards making happy memories again.