Posted in Fun, Uncategorized

Your smile for the day

Every time I see this commercial, it never fails to make me laugh. It answers the age old question, “Who is the boss?” Mothers wear many hats and do it with grace. And while adults believe they speak the truth, don’t we all know it’s really the children who tell it like it is? Follow this link for a smile                      

Your Smile for the day

Posted in life, love, Uncategorized


When you buy a diamond, the jeweler examines it for flaws. The fewer flaws it has, the higher the price. It has a greater value. I think our society has fallen into this trap except we apply the microscope to people. If they have the smallest flaw, they are dismissed. We all know the power of photoshop. I fall into this trap and don’t want to post any photo of myself unless I remove the eye wrinkles and whiten my teeth. Heaven forbid if I had some real rather than perceived flaw. If we are are privileged enough to live to old age, we will have wrinkles, scars, skin folds etc. Only those who die young, die without evidence of living. 

I love the Winston Graham novels about Ross Poldark. And in book four The Black Moon, his wife is embarrassed about her scarred knees. In the modern world the husband would be giving her the name of a good plastic surgeon so she could ‘fix’ the scars. But Ross says one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever read, “Blemishes on the beauty of a person one loves are like grace notes adding something to a piece of music.” 

I can add nothing more profound or loving to that statement.

Posted in Faith, love, Uncategorized

I’m in Love

Yes it’s true. I’ve fallen head over heals in love. He stole my heart the first time I met him and now I get to spend two days a week with him. Who is he? He is the 16 month old son of two doctors, who I will call APL. It’s been a long time since I’ve spent time with a toddler. They have a lot of energy but they also have an infinite amount of love to give.

Observing him as he explores the world and the way it works, is fascinating. I can see his brain working. And when he laughs and smiles at me, I’m filled with joy and happiness. And it is a blessing to be able to care for him. I’d love to post a photo, but since he isn’t my son, I won’t.

Posted in Dreaming, Experience, Fun, love, Uncategorized

School Girl Crush

When I went through my preteen and teenage years, I found it utterly ridiculous that girls had mad crushes on actors and singers. Buying TeenBeat Magazine, putting posters on their walls all seemed a waste of time. I didn’t scream at concerts or get butterflies if I thought I’d see someone famous. Did I miss something? I think I did. The idea of dreaming and longing and believing in something wonderful like love with a music star, no matter how unlikely it was, brought joy and excitement to many girls’ lives. I spent too much of my time just worrying about fitting in. I find it so interesting that now, of all times in my life, I have a mad teenage crush on a book character/actor. Of course I realize he is fictional and the actor is too young and famous, to ever be a reality, but it’s enabled be to dream a little and believe a little that there is the possibility of love again.

Aidan Turner as Ross Poldark on Masterpiece Theater/BBC 

Posted in Poverty, women

Are you Confused?

Let me get this straight because I’m completely confused. The media and public are upset because Donald Trump made lewd comments about women and behaved in an ungentlemanly way towards them? This is the same media and public who enjoy Kim Kardashian’s nude photos? This is the same media and public who have forgotten Bill Clinton used his power to intimidate a young woman into providing oral sex in the Oval Office and his wife disparaged the woman’s reputation? **I am not voting for any of the 4 candidates on the ballot in November.**

How many stories in the past few years have been reported about professional sports stars and college players who rape women? How many billions of dollars a year does the public spend on pornography, which no matter how “soft” demeans women? How many magazine covers trash women because they’ve gained weight or look old or had plastic surgery? How many billions of dollars does society spend on human trafficking for prostitution? You think it’s not in your neighborhood but you’re wrong. The man next door (like my ex  a Captain for American Airlines and porn addict and prostitute user and peeping Tom) is spending his money at strip clubs, on pornogrpahy featuring younger and younger girls and prostitutes.  What kind of society do we live in when you can buy a padded bra for a 7 year old girl in any big box store? You don’t see groin enhancers in the little boys department.

We live in a society which does NOT support women. It is economically imbalanced. Women are judged differently by both men and women. Old men can still use money and power to marry young women. Everyone applauded George Clooney when he married Amal Alamuddin but he’s 17 years older than she is. He could be her dad! Had the age difference been reversed, the media would have called the woman all sorts of names like cougar. We celebrate women when they are young and beautiful. And we have our token strong women but as a whole, beginning at an early age we are sexualized. Even female athletes are judged on their bodies and clothing style.

I hate what Donald Trump said. I hate what Bill did and Hillary Clinton said. What I hate the most is we still live in a society which punishes behavior and speech on a selective basis. The media decides who gets punished and who gets to walk away without being tarnished.

 Women, we will NEVER reach our potential as long we play by men’s rules. It’s time to take charge, change the rules and ultimately change the game. It’s time to cross our legs and say hell no to sex without marriage. (You’ll live. It won’t kill you to do without sex for awhile). And we should do it not for a religious reason, but to take charge, change the focus and be the leaders rather than the followers. As long as we allow ourselves to be  valued first and foremost as sex objects, (just take a look at YouTube and Instagram and the young girls posting adult provocative photos), nothing will change. Until we demand a salary and benefits for stay at home moms, we won’t be valued. When we play by their rules, we lose every time. When we send mixed messages and compete against each other rather than work together, men will always come out on top. When a husband can walk away after 30 years and leave his ex wife in poverty, while he moves on to a younger woman, women will suffer. How many commercials do you see for viagra and cialis with a young woman talking about her man, only to see he’s old? How many commercials do you see for  women’s sexual enhancement drugs? A big fat ZERO! Apparently as long as we’ve got a man, we’re satisfied. 

How can the media and women bash old Donald when they spend everyday encouraging that very behavior? If you agree please share.

Read more at The Shriver Report in Poverty

1 in 3 American women, 42 million women, plus 28 million children, either live in poverty or are right on the brink of it. (The report defines the “brink of poverty” as making $47,000 a year for a family of four.)

Nearly two-thirds of minimum wage workers are women, and these workers often get zero paid sick days.

Two-thirds of American women are either the primary or co-breadwinners of their families.

The average woman is paid 77 cents for every dollar a man makes, and that figure is much lower for black and Latina women; African American women earn only 64 cents and Hispanic women only 55 cents for every dollar made by a white man.

More than half of the babies born to moms who are under 30 are born to unmarried mothers, and most of them are white.

75% of unmarried mothers are under 30, and only 7% of have finished college. Single motherhood and lack of a college degree are two of the strongest indicators of poverty.

Even though women outnumber men in higher education, men still make more money than women who have the same level of educational achievement, from high school diplomas to advanced graduate degrees. And in 2011, men with bachelors’ degrees earned more than women with graduate degrees.

Posted in book, books, depression, Uncategorized, Writing

Lists and Journals

I am an addict. I love books and journals. Walking past a bookstore and not going in takes a tremendous amount of willpower. I’ve learned to use the library to save money but sometimes you just have to give in. I ordered #52happylists and #52listsprojects by @mooreaseal #mooreaseal because I have struggled with the idea I can be happy again.

I know it’s just a matter of refocusing but having my supportive friends living thousands of miles away has made it difficult. I’ve wandered and not been able to stay hopeful that my life will change for the better. I know if you read my blog, you understand how depressed I’ve been.

I read about the The 52 lists for Happiness on a Psychology Twitter feed and thought why not. I ordered them on #amazon and as a #amazonprime member, I paid no shipping costs. The challenge now is to stay on task and fill out each list so hope and happiness return. Thanks #sasquatchbooks for publishing them.

Posted in Blogging, Blogging101, Learning, Uncategorized

Learning as I go

Okay folks. Thought I had this blogging thing down but apparently not. My upbeat blog, as opposed to this one which tends to be depressing can now be found at A Fresh New Life

Posted in Experience, Fun, Uncategorized

Tasting Mead

Today I went to Walker Honey Farm for their Fall Festival and Farmer’s Market. It was a wonderful way to spend my Saturday morning. They make honey products including Mead. If you don’t know what mead is this link will give you the information you need. Brewery:Mead This information is taken from  their website.

The History and Tradition of Mead

Mead is a honey-based fermented beverage that has been produced and enjoyed since before the dawn of recorded history. Because of its antiquity, mead has acquired an almost magical reputation in our mythologies. For example, the term “honeymoon” is intertwined with the custom of drinking honey-based mead for a month (moon) after the wedding; this practice was said to ensure baby boys. Mead making was once the province of a select, trained guild. Now, it is open to all who have the patience and skill. You are continuing this long and honored tradition. Welcome, aboard and enjoy.

I tried regular mead, raspberry mead, and blackberry mead. They were all delicious. Before leaving I bought some marinade/salsa and some homegrown tomatoes.

Posted in Blogging, choices, communication, depression, Goal, New life, Uncategorized

An Experiment

I am going to try an experiment. Does writing my depressive thoughts encourage my depression to stay? I’ve made an old blog visible and for the rest of October, I am going to write only positive things and see if this helps my state of mind.

So I am asking my LifeRewritten followers to follow me at A Fresh New Life and find out if I get an answer when my experiment is finished.

Posted in family, seasons, Uncategorized



Autumn is my favorite time of year. After a long hot summer, the slightly cooler temperatures feel refreshing. While we don’t have fall color here in central Texas, I can enjoy them through Instagram. I’d love to live somewhere with all four seasons, but for now, this is where I am.

Without fall color, the scent of burning leaves, pumpkin farms, apple orchards and a chill in the air, how can I find the spirit of Autumn? I’ve pulled out my fall decor. I’ve planted bulbs. I am making pumpkin muffins and pumpkin cookies. My apple and cinnamon candle is burning. It is amazing how much scent can evoke feelings and memories.

One of my favorite fall memories is when my ex-husband and I went to Cattle Congress in Waterloo, Iowa. We lived close enough to walk. It was a chilly evening, the stars were bright, we held hands and laughed at the day’s events. When we finally made it home, we spoke of the future because we had learned a few days earlier we were going to become parents. Of course, I had no way of knowing how much joy my daughter would bring to me and fortunately I didn’t know how much sorrow and heartache my ex-husband would bring to me throughout our 30 years of marriage.

Maybe I love autumn because when I look back, I had some of my most amazing days between September and December.