Posted in books, choices, communication, Dating, divorce, friendship, Fun, love, marriage, New life, Uncategorized, women

Dating Profiles

After being married for 30 years, divorced for almost 3 years, I am considering dating websites. I tried them when I first got divorced but thankfully realized facing rejection from thousands of men wasn’t a good idea.

I’ve read up on what makes a good profile and it seems everyone has a different opinion. I tend to agree with the folks that say photos are the most important along with a good headline. I know if I am not attracted to the photo I don’t read the profile. The challenge is remembering I am not that twenty something girl looking for a date. I read a dating expert say that we look at profiles with our young minds. So women see old men who look like their dads and grandpas and men see old women  who look like their moms and grandmas. I admit that is true for me. And then add the additional challenge that men can date down in age, economics and education more easily than women. Now before you lecture me that age is a state of mind and older women date younger men, I am talking about relationships. I am not talking about friendships or a sexual affair even though things are necessary to a good relationship but many times we experience them individually.

I read something in a novel by Louise Penny which I want to use in my profile when I do get brave enough and strong enough to try dating again. This is paraphrased from The Long Way Home by Louise Penny.

She wasn’t made for a Paris runway but for good meals and books by the fire and laughter. She was constructed from and for happiness. She helps you discover how very attractive a heart and mind can be.

Posted in Blogging, choices, communication, daily prompt, daughters, family, love, Uncategorized

Unexpected Visitors

10 pm: Bedtime

Toss and turn unable to get comfortable but my time was coming and I only had to wait until morning.

6 am: The alarm rings. I am awake because I never really fell asleep. I shake my husband out of his dreams and tell him we are due to arrive no later than 7 am.

6:15 am: A quick shower, get dressed, check my bag and tell my husband it is almost time to leave.

6:30 am: I call my parents and let them know we are leaving soon and to check on my daughter. She is still sound asleep.

6:40 am: It is still dark outside since it is a July day. The heat is stifling even at this hour. Though freshly showered, I can feel the sweat begin to bead and roll down my neck. I should have brought something to pull my hair back.

6:45 am: We leave for the short 15 minute drive.

7:00 am: I am dropped off and taken by wheelchair upstairs. My husband joins me as soon as he parks.

7:15 am: All checked in, ready to go but still apprehensive. This is my second time and just like last time I didn’t begin on my own. I needed help.

7:30 am: Dr. gives me a visit. Checks the pitocin drip. Contractions have begun. The Dr. guesses the baby will weigh between 7 and 8 pounds.

10:00 am: I ask for a pain reliever. Nurse gives me something but fails to tell me it is short term and won’t last more than 15 minutes.

10:15 am: Nurse suggests I make a bathroom run because she thinks it will be a long day.

10:30 am: Return to bed and tell nurse I need to push. She says there is no way because I wasn’t ready. I disagreed with her and said I NEED to push. Asked for more painkiller and was told it was too late.

11:05 am: Beautiful baby girl is born and I hear a round of applause. Putting my glasses on I realize there is a sea of faces in the birthing room. It was student nurse day and they just “happened” to stop in. Dr. guesses my new daughter weighs 9 lbs 13 oz. Official weight 10 lbs. Very good guess.

*** Lesson learned and shared with all mothers-to-be: If you do not want unexpected visitors in the birthing room, when you take your hospital tour and fill out paperwork ask if it is a teaching hospital and you want to specify you do not want students in your room. Every mother-to-be has been so happy I shared from my experience.

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Posted in Blogging, choices, communication, daily prompt, divorce, friends, friendship, love, marriage, Uncategorized, women, writing101

Catching up with a friend

  
I never thought we would be apart for so many years. It seems like only yesterday we were young mothers raising our children. Struggling to make ends meet. Somehow we always managed to find the fun and humor in every day. But where have the years gone? When I look at you I see the same, sparkling young woman I met almost 30 years ago. You have the same spirit, creativity and joy for life. Now you are securely planted with a family of one husband, five children, four in-laws, nine grandchildren, a variety of pets and two spectacular homes. There is no one I’ve ever met that deserves happiness more than you do.

Me you ask? My life took an entirely different path than your own. I do have two lovely children and one son-in-law but I’ve lost everything else. My husband left me. I lost my home. I lost my friends. I lost my community. I lost all security. I even lost my faith for awhile. I lost my desire to see another day.

Why didn’t you know? Because you never asked. I don’t blame you. When a life is as full and rich as your’s is, time goes by quickly, like a flash of lightening. When life is broken and empty as mine is, time feels like a loud ticking clock. With each movement of the hand, it reminds you life is passing by and you don’t get a second chance. I don’t know if I don’t reach in for life enough or if when I do life spits me out. Honestly it feels like the second one.

I hope dear friend that we don’t go years without talking or seeing each other. I love you and always will.

Posted in Blogging, Blogging101, choices, communication, daily prompt, Dreaming, Faith, fear, forgiveness, friends, God, Hiding, love, Moving, New life, people, questions, Uncategorized, Writing, writing101

A story in an Image Challenge #3

  
In the midst of the crowd

Are lives being lived

Hearts being broken

Dreams being realized 

Goodbyes being whispered

Hellos being shouted

Business being conducted 

Weariness being all encompassing

Love being healing

Seconds being stolen

Minutes being horded

Hours being occupied

Days being treasured

Time to embrace life being lost to the 

busyness of the day.

Posted in books, communication, daily prompt, Dreaming, letters, sweepstakes, vacation, Writing

Sweepstakes

giveaway

   Do you ever get lost in a daydream? Wonder what it would be like to travel to faraway destinations. Do you look at photos from around the world on Instagram? I do. I love the window into lives around the world. I also love to write letters. There is something so personal and intimate about letters. While they may not be immediate communication, they are something which can express who you are and how you feel so much better than a text or email. When I receive a handwritten card or letter in my mail, it brightens my day. So I am going to help you by giving away a set of three 5 x 7 notecards and two postcards by Hunter and Hobbs valued at $20. Photos taken in Switzerland and France.

To enter: Click the link and follow the simple directions to enter. Additional entries are available by following the directions. Good Luck!

Hunter and Hobbs Sweepstakes

giveaway1

Posted in communication, friendship, love, Mail, Writing

Text vs Email vs Letter

note

According to the internet there are six billion texts and 100 billions emails sent every day. Personal, handwritten letters are almost extinct. When I searched online for how many letters are sent everyday all I could find were estimates from several years ago and it was for total pieces of mail. The number was about 700 million which would include advertisements, bills and just general junk mail. So there is no definitive answer to how many personal letters are sent daily.

Should it matter how you communicate as long as you communicate with those you love? Speed would be the primary argument in favor of a text. You write it. You hit send. And the message is almost instantaneously received on the other end. Argument for e-mail is that it allows a time trail of communication with each email sent being time and date stamped. So aren’t those methods the best? Don’t they make the most sense?

If you are trying to send a simple message, then yes, those methods work. But I was thinking about the importance of a handwritten note or letter and why it has so much more significance. First it takes time and effort to hand write a note, then address an envelope, stamp it and mail it. So just the very act of doing it says to the receiver you care. Second meaning can be carried in the handwriting itself. Handwriting is personal. Everyone has a slightly different style. And over time a recipient can see changes in the writing. Does your mother’s hand look weaker than normal? Is your friend stressing certain words differently? Next, a note or letter can carry the scent of the person who wrote it. We’ve all heard of the perfume scented letter but what about one that has the scent of smoked wood, or vanilla or anything that leaves a personal mark. It creates a sense of being closer when you are aware of the scent of the sender. And if we only communicate by text and email, when we are gone from this world what will remain of us? How will future generations know we loved our family and friends? What written evidence will be left? Certainly not our texts and emails.

So take a chance. Go buy some inexpensive note cards (they usually don’t allow a lot of room for writing so the sender doesn’t feel overwhelmed by the need to fill the page), buy some stamps, compile a list of five friends or family members and write them a short note. Make it a habit. When I receive a note or letter in my mailbox among the bills or junk, it completely brightens my day and all for under $1.