I haven’t been posting because as my anger and bitterness has lessened (most of the time), I find I’m not sure what to write. I’ve used writing for so long to express my darkest feelings, now that I don’t feel so dark on the inside, it seems I don’t have much to say.
That alone bothers me. Who only has negative things to say and nothing positive or upbeat? Who goes through each day neither sad nor happy? Who has flat emotions?
I’ve asked my doctor to wean off my anti-depressant because I think after being on it for four years, it has dulled my emotions. I don’t necessarily feel sad, but neither do I feel happy or joy. Even the birth of my first grandson feels flat and not as exciting or emotionally moving as I expected.
Does anyone else struggle with having no emotions?
My life on an unexpected path 
Is it no emotions, or are you still depressed? Either one is a real possibility, as I understand it. Don’t worry about only being able to write with negative feelings. Consider it a gift that allows you to process those feelings. You just have to train your mind to believe you have more to say…and I know you do.
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I don’t feel despressed. I feel displaced and as though I’m in a holding pattern.
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I get it. You’ve come a long way. I’ve been there, and it takes time. For me, I was in a state of shock for a long time.
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